Thursday, November 17, 2011

Before Having Sex with a Vampire…


Who’s excited?!?!?  Me, me, pick me!  No for sure plans of when I’ll get to see this movie this weekend, but you better believe it will happen!  Even if you are not a Twilight fan, I thought I would provide some comic relief for you!  Planned Parenthood released this article, I swear!

 

Thinking About Having Sex with a Vampire This Halloween? Planned Parenthood is Here to Help 

 

Let’s face it: vampires can rack up a lot of sexual partners over the years. Your vampire might be the same age as you, or she or he might be thousands of years old. But no matter how old you are, if you’re going to jump into bed with a vampire, you’re going to need more than a clove of garlic to protect your health.

Here are some things to think about before you enter into a sexual relationship with a vampire:

  • Vampires might be immortal, but you’re not. It’s important for both vampires and humans to get tested for STDs. Use this tool to find out if you should get tested for STDs.
  • Ladies, just because a vampire says he can’t get you pregnant*, it doesn’t mean he can’t give you an STD. And guys, just because a vampire says she’s on the pill, it doesn’t mean that you can’t get an STD. Use a condom correctly every time.
  • Don’t wait until you’re in the heat of the moment to bring up safer sex. Vampires have been known to “glamour” people to get their way, so play it safe and make it clear that you won’t have sex without protection right from the start.  Remember, a vampire who doesn't care about protecting your health is not the kind of vampire that you want to get involved with. Not sure if you’re dating the right vampire? We can help you figure it out. 
  • Let’s not forget, Edward got Bella pregnant in the Twilight series, going against hundreds of years of vampire  lore. So even if your vampire tells you he can’t get you pregnant, why risk it? Condoms are not only a great way to prevent STDs, they’re effective at preventing pregnancy. Even better, use a condom along with another birth control method. 

If you’re seeing it tonight, enjoy!
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16 comments:

It's A Love Story said...

Perfect funny!

Meghan said...

that is hilarious! i am SO excited to see the movie, though we're waiting until tomorrow. can't wait!

Kaolee said...

LOL. That's hilarious.

And yes, I'll be watching Breaking Dawn Friday night at 7:30PM! Team Jacob!

Michelle P said...

Haha love this!

Sam {fitnessfoodandfaith.blogspot.com} said...

hahahaha!! too funny :)

can't wait!! team edward all the way.

moderndaywife said...

Love it!!! I'm seeing it Sunday
:-D Team Jacob!!!!

Whitney said...

Sooo funny!!! I have to admit i broke down and bought the first movie today on dvd. I am pretty excited to see what all the fuss is about. I hear i am gonna be obsesses ;-)

Caitlin C. said...

Hahah, this is too funny! I LOVE it! I wish I was at the premiere right now.. I'm determined to see it sometime this weekend!

Kristen said...

Haha....too funny!

You'll have to let me know what you think of it when you see it! :)

Katie's Kollections said...

haha! pretty funny! I only saw the first movie I'm hoping I can watch the other ones soon.

E- said...

I stumbled across your blog and I think it stuck out to me bc I'm also from the Midwest and we had VERY similar wedding dresses :) Love your blog! Mine's new, but located at http://missbmrsm.blogspot.com/

Sincerely Sara Cate said...

I can't believe that document was actually published. It served its purpose though - it caught your attention! Happy twilighting!

Mrs. Pancakes said...

That's too funny!! If the commercials are any indication...it's epic!!

dave and jenn said...

haha, that's hilarious! I can't wait to see it!

Jamie said...

That's funny!

Jessie said...

OMG, I found your blog from Miss Katie at KC&CO... this post is FAN-FREAKING-TASTIC! HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Cute blog girlie, cannot wait to keep reading!!!!